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PUA Skills – Compliance

6 January 2011 5 Comments

There are 5 basic ways in which humans can interact with each other:

1. we demonstrate a higher value to others (DHV).

2. we demonstrate a lower value (DLV).

3. we indicate our interest in others (IOI).

4. we indicate our disinterest (IOD).

5. we test for Compliance (almost all interactions at some point come down to a test for compliance).

If you have read anything to do with pick up theory, you will probably be very familiar with the above terminology. The subject of this article is compliance but what exactly does this mean?

There is a lot of talk on the pua forum about Compliance, but most guys don’t really understand the term at all.  Compliance comes down to asking someone to do something for you. Whether they do it or not depends on what they perceive as being acceptable behavior in that situation and what levels of comfort they have with you. They will have a threshold and if your request is beyond that threshold, then they will say no. Where this threshold lies will vary greatly depending on who is asking them.

What’s an Example of how a PUA Would Use Compliance

A good example of this is if you walk up to your girlfriend and kiss her, she will let you as you have a high level of compliance with her. She is your girlfriend after all and you have massive levels of comfort. However, if a stranger walked up to her and tried to kiss her, then he would have no chance of doing so (you’d hope!).

Another example would be if you are hanging out with your best friend and you ask him to do something for you, there is a much better chance of him doing it compared with a random stranger walking down the street.

In short, a guy of high value is likely to get more compliance from a woman than a guy of lower value.

Taking this compliance into the pick-up field, the hugely popular and successful Mystery Method system states that an interaction with women should follow the following order:

  • we open a set (an opener itself is a very small compliance test).
  • we then use an IOD (a neg in pick up terminology).
  • we then DHV.
  • we receive IOIs from the woman.
  • we then use a compliance test.
  • we can then give an IOI back if compliance is successful.

This cycle continues until we reach sex which is estimated to be around 65% compliance. Please note that full compliance is extremely rare. An example would be if you tell a girl to cut herself and she does it. Also note that the more value that you can demonstrate before a compliance test, then the more chance of success you have.

We all know that no pick up method is 100% successful. Looking further at the Mystery Method, of which Sinn says completes 85% of the puzzle, this still leaves 15% unaccounted for. Sinns says part of this 15% can be attributed to what he calls negative compliance momentum. So how does this phenomenon fit in with the Mystery Method and what exactly does it mean?

Picture the scene, you are in a bar and open a set and instantly the girls are attracted to you. It is all going perfectly. As you are following the Mystery Method to the letter, you then neg them as this what you are supposed to do, right? The dynamic of the interaction immediately changes for the worse and the attraction that you had is completely lost. This is due to negative compliance momentum.

In simple terms, using the neg resulted in you punishing the girls for their good behavior, when there was no need to. This doesn’t make sense does it? Why would you do such a thing? The girls obviously took offence at YOUR bad behavior and walked away from the interaction.

This is a common scenario and if you find yourself being blown out with what you would call lower quality girls (maybe 5s or 6s in the looks department) and genuinely nice girls, this could be the reason why.

On the other hand, very attractive girls (9s or 10s) will not usually want to talk to you immediately after an opener, so you need to neg them to establish compliance. Can you see the difference here? Tread with care when using the neg, it has a time and place! If you don’t, then you may get defiance and not compliance.


  • Richard said:

    Hi Guys,

    I have read the theory on Pick Up and feel ready to go out there and practice however my problem is I do not have anyone to go out with in the evening to practice my night game. I recently moved to a new town so I don’t know too many people. At work most of my friends are either married or spend the evenings with the girl friends and the same goes goes for my friends outside work. Im in a catch 22 situation.

    I am therefore left with the option of going out alone. I feel uncomfortable doing this however I have to start somewhere. Does anyone have any advice for night game when out alone? Or perhaps someone can share their thoughts who has been in a similar situation?

  • milk said:

    ..Okay guys..I started serious PUA like last year..so this situation is trick-what do you think about this chick whose number i asked and she says wait?She has a boyfriend and she’s also older than me…

  • Natalia said:

    Just Flat out tell her why you don’t think its going to work.things get difficult and well hell just be like i don’t think im good enoguh for you

  • Johnston said:

    Richard, a key element is confidence and just getting out there and trying. Set yourself an achievable goal and make sure you get out every day or week or whatever you’ve set for yourself. It’s only by being out there, trying stuff that you learn. Put aside time to build your confidence by challenging yourself, at day or night.

  • Ben said:

    Going out alone is just like going out with a (presumable) wingman, except… he’s there to give you confidence and make you look good, and to keep the interest of the fat friend.

    If you have confidence enough to approach women alone, particularly attractive women, they’ll be more likely to be interested in you initially. That’s been my experience, at any rate.

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